Six years ago, when I was 15, I was worried about the boy I liked, going to the prom for my first date, and acting in my first show.
When I look back, I wish I had the knowledge that I have now. I wish I had played less, and talked to my mom more. If I could go back I would have spent more time with her, asked her more about her life, and all of the other things I want to know.
My mom battled colon cancer for a few months, in fact the cancer was getting better, however, my mother developed an infection that, due to the chemo, her body was not strong enough to fight off.
I remember that day clearly (April 1st 2004) and all the people that came to the say goodbye to my mother, and offer support. I will always be grateful to those who helped my family, and for all the friendships my mother had. I hope everyone knows how much they are appreciated, and loved.
Early that morning she was taken to the hospital for what we all knew to be the last time. I have many memories of all the wonderful experiences; such as my young woman leader buying 4 prom dresses so I could try them on, and my mom could help me pick out a dress, my sister coming home from school, and my brother coming back from his mission for the funeral (sadly, he didn't get to see her again before she passed on.) I'm so glad my mother had a friend like Maureen Bringhurst, who made my family coming together possible. I also can easily recall all the feelings I had, the pain, the coping and the love and spirit that was felt.
What I am most grateful for, is that she felt no pain in the end. There was nothing the doctors could do, except keep her from feeling pain. Of course, medicine made it hard for her to recognize us at times... but in the end, in the last moments of her life, she knew us all and we had the chance to laugh with her one last time, share stories and just talk and feel love. That was a gift that I have, and will always, cherish.
Just after midnight, April 2nd 2004, my mother passed away. That was an experience that has forever changed my life. I have learned so much about happiness, love, life, letting go of the little things, and living in the moment. I wish I could see her now, but I know she is always near.
I will always love and miss her, however I know she is happy, and well, and free of pain... I know she's where she needs to be. My mother was a wonderful woman. She had many qualities that I strive to exhibit in my own life. I wish Michael could meet her, but I know he will one day.
Thanks to my beliefs, I know I will be with her again someday, and I look forward to that
I mentioned the following lyrics in a
previous post, however I am sharing them again as they have been on my mind a lot lately.
Goodbye for now, it's not the end, our Father needs you this day
There's work for you, so we must wait, a life eternal we'll have.
Always, we love you and in our hearts you will stay,
All of our days on earth we'll walk faithful,
For the day we'll see you again.
One day we'll see you again.
-Lyrics by Mia Magistro
